


Steele No Competition

by flimflam99



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Remington Steele AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-14
Updated: 2017-12-14
Packaged: 2019-02-14 21:14:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13016262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flimflam99/pseuds/flimflam99
Summary: It seems Sherlock Holmes isn't the only detective on the planet........





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> As suggested by Samrosie, a short Sherlock/Remington Steele AU. Set after HLV. In the Remington Steele universe set in Season 1 but brought into same timeline as after HLV

Sherlock was trawling through the internet looking for interesting cases as his inbox was currently empty. Now that Mary was nearing eight months in her pregnancy John had decided to drastically cut back being at Sherlock’s beck and call and so Sherlock was reduced to looking for cases himself. He was just about to give up and close the internet page he was on when something caught his eye.

‘Great Detective Cracks Missing Person Case’.

Sherlock’s eyes narrowed. He hadn’t solved a missing person case for several weeks. He scrolled down the page and then his mind went blank as he realised that the ‘Great Detective’ they were referring to wasn’t him! He scrolled further down the page to the picture underneath. The man standing proudly was tall, dark and handsome. Sherlock enlarged the picture and studied the man thoughtfully. There was something not quite right about him. Great detective my foot, he scoffed. He took note of the man’s name, Remington Steele, head of the Remington Steele Detective Agency based in Los Angeles.

Sherlock immediately started planning his trip to LA to thwart this ‘Remington Steele’. (What sort of a name was that anyway?!) He’d need a cover, he mused thoughtfully. He then studied the other occupant of the room (the person who owned the flat he was currently using as a bolthole) Molly Hooper, pathologist of St. Barts. She was curled up in an armchair, reading a book, her glasses slipping down her nose and her hair coming out of its ponytail. Sherlock thought she had never looked lovelier. Perhaps a trip to LA would help him to take the first step to starting a relationship with her. 

“Molly?” Molly hummed at him, a sure sign that she had got to a good bit in her book but he pressed his luck.

“Molly!” He stated more firmly. Molly’s head shot up, a slight frown on her face.

“What Sherlock?” She huffed at him.

“Fancy a trip to LA?” Molly’s mouth fell open.

“What? Why?”

“Because I need you for a case. Because if this man….” Sherlock showed her the picture on his laptop, “… is a detective, I will eat my deerstalker”.

\------------------------------------------

So that was how Molly found herself in one of the Presidential Suites in the Four Seasons Hotel in Los Angeles looking out of one of the windows at the magnificent view. Dressed in a very expensive dress with her hair professionally done and a big shiny diamond engagement ring to go with her big 24 carat gold wedding ring sparkling on her finger. Her ‘husband’ of five years Scott Morstan (aka Sherlock) stood behind her fiddling with his cufflinks (how he hated those!) and cursing under his breath.

“So you’re taking me out for dinner?” Molly clarified disbelievingly. Sherlock looked up from trying to fasten his cufflinks to frown with annoyance at her.

“It’s part of the plan, yes.” His attention returned to the cufflinks and he was somewhat bemused when Molly’s fingers brushed his own aside to fasten them for him.

“You don’t like cufflinks, so why are you wearing them?” She stared up at him, smirking slightly.

“To look the part obviously.” He put his jacket on and then picked up Molly’s wrap which he then draped over her before offering her his arm. “Are you ready, Mrs Morstan?” He grinned at her.

“As I’ll ever be, Mr Morstan” She replied taking his arm and giving it a quick squeeze.

\----------------------------------------------

It all happened so suddenly. Molly had gone to the rest room to use the facilities and the next thing she knew she was being held up at gunpoint by a masked man who demanded her jewellery. All hell had broken loose and now she was sat at the table in the restaurant with ‘Scott’ sat next to her, comforting her and being asked questions by a policeman.

“Well, I think that’s all for now ma’am.” The police officer concluded. “We’ll be in touch”. He nodded at her, ‘Scott’ stood up and shook hands with him and then Molly and Sherlock left the restaurant.

Sherlock bundled Molly into a taxi and ushered her back to their suite. Once inside Molly collapsed onto the sofa, and Sherlock could see she was still shaking.

“I am s-so s-sorry, Sherlock. Th-those rings must have cost a fo-fortune” She stuttered, tears rolling down her face.

“Well that was the whole point, wasn’t it?” Sherlock rubbed his hands in glee. “I thought it all went rather well. Why are you shaking Molly? Are you cold?”

Molly slowly turned to him a flush appearing on her face.

“It was you? You did this?” She stood up from the sofa and paced towards him. Sherlock for some inexplicable reason found himself walking backwards away from her.

“Not me personally, Molly. I got a man who owed me a favour to do it.” He frowned in confusion. “Don’t glare at me, Molly. You already knew this.”

“I did not!” Molly shouted. “When? When did you tell me that I was going to be held at gunpoint while I was in the loo?” 

Sherlock had backed himself into a corner and Molly was stood so close to him, he could see the tears brimming in her eyes.

“On the plane?” He queried, half to himself. “Umm… Actually might have had that conversation with mind Molly” He admitted.

Molly opened her mouth to shout at him again and then shut it again. “Mind Molly?” 

“Hmm. The Molly that is in my Mind Palace. I think I might have told her and not you, sorry.”

“What other conversations do you have with her?” Molly asked faintly. Sherlock shifted a faint flush on his cheeks.

“I really am sorry, Molly.” He evaded her question. Molly bent her head, quickly stepping away from him.

“Well, this Molly is going to go to bed. Goodnight Sherlock”. She turned from him, practically falling over her dress to get away.

“Oh, ok. I’ll be in a bit later.” Sherlock muttered, taking off his jacket and undoing his cufflinks. Molly halted before whirling round to face him.

“Sorry, what? You’ll be in where?” She squeaked.

Sherlock rolled his eyes. “In the bedroom, obviously.”

“You’re not sleeping with me!” Molly thundered. “This is the presidential suite, there is more than one bedroom, use one of those.”

Sherlock scoffed. “We need to look the part, Molly. When Remington Steele looks round our apartment tomorrow we don’t want it being obvious we slept in separate bedrooms. I didn’t think it would be a problem, I’ve slept in your bed with you before.” He finished challengingly.

“That was different, there was only the one bed and my sofa is much too small for me, let alone you. Well, I suppose it is a king size bed” Sherlock smirked, Molly glared at him. “Just don’t snore in my ear like you usually do!” Molly snapped back before walking into the bedroom and slamming the door.

Sherlock waited ten minutes before cautiously opening the door to the bedroom to find Molly half in and half out of her dress, struggling.

“Do you need some help?” Sherlock queried, trying not to laugh at the sight of her.

“If you bloody laugh, I’ll kill you. My hair is caught in the zip.” Molly’s voice was muffled as her head was currently inside her dress. Sherlock paused for a second to make sure that he had committed the sight of Molly in (mostly) just her underwear to memory before stepping in and gently disentangling her hair from the zip. Molly’s face was red when she finally reappeared from the dress and she uttered a curt thank you before taking her night clothes and disappearing into the ensuite bathroom.

Sherlock changed and got into bed. When Molly reappeared he pretended to be asleep and she got into bed silently, turning away from him and switching off the light. Sherlock had been hoping that they would have ‘the talk’ this evening and wondered how he had managed to mess it up so badly. 

\--------------------------------------------------------

They were in the lift on the way up to the offices of the Remington Steele Detective Agency. Molly was still in a mood with Sherlock and he didn’t know whether it was because of the mock mugging or his ‘mind Molly’ comment. 

“When we get out of the lift we need to act like we are cross with one another.” Sherlock explained quickly. “I blame you for giving the rings away so easily and you obviously aren’t happy that I think that.”

“So I’m cross with you too?” Molly clarified. Sherlock nodded. The lift pinged and Sherlock and Molly stepped out. 

“Honestly Molly you must have realised that the gun was fake, anybody could see that!” Scott (aka Sherlock) thundered at her. The door to the offices opened and Mr Steele himself walked out.

“You absolute bastard!” Molly yelled. Her hand flashed out and landed on Sherlock’s face in a ringing slap. She slapped him harder than that time he was on drugs. Sherlock’s face was a picture, Molly thought with satisfaction as she could see the genuine shock on his face. Good. She promptly burst into fake tears and not looking where she was going, turned and landed on a broad chest. Remington Steele’s chest.

“Oh there, there, Mrs……….?” A voice lighter than Sherlock’s but much warmer. Molly’s head shot up to look into the handsome face of Remington Steele. She stepped back, wiping the tears from her very red face.

“Morstan. Mr and Mrs Morstan” Sherlock stepped in, offering his hand to Steele who shook it warmly. Sherlock took Molly’s arm and squeezed warningly. Molly still looked quite dazed. “You are Remington Steele, aren’t you? We need your help.” 

“Then come in, come in.” Steele waved his hand at the door and ushered them into the reception area. “Miss Wolf, would you mind making some tea for our Clients?”.

“But Mr Steele, Miss Holt’s not here yet”. 

“I’m sure I can cope on my own, Miss Wolf”. Steele smiled ingratiatingly at her.

“It’s Miss Fox” She muttered crossly to herself.

\---------------------------------------------------

Molly wasn’t really listening as Sherlock told Remington Steele all about the ordeal last night. Mr Steele asked her a few questions which she answered quite honestly but she was too busy comparing the two men. Steele was slightly taller, his dark hair curl free and his mouth lacked Sherlock’s cupid bow lips but otherwise they could be twins. He had impeccable manners and was very charming. Two things that Sherlock completely lacked.

“I think my wife is still in shock.” Sherlock put his arm round her and then gently kissed her on the cheek. Molly’s insides melted. It was no good, it was still him she wanted.

“Yes of course” Steele responded quickly. “There are several leads that Miss Holt and I can follow. I’ll be in touch, Mr Morstan.” He shook hands with them both, keeping hold of Molly’s hands for slightly longer and then they left.

Sherlock waited until they were alone in the lift before speaking.

“I was completely correct, the man’s an idiot.” He smirked smugly.

“Really? He seemed ok to me.” Sherlock frowned down at Molly.

“Yes, you did seem quite taken with him. No, he has no deductive skills. He can't even get the name of his receptionist right.”

“That doesn’t mean anything! You can’t get Greg’s name right” Molly objected. Sherlock looked confused.

“Greg?”

“Detective Inspector Lestrade!” Molly shot back. Sherlock’s face cleared and then pursed his lips.

“Hardly the same thing.” He sniffed. He looked at his watch. “I think we’ve got time for lunch before the next act begins.”

“What happens next then?” 

“He’ll go to the restaurant and hopefully pick up the clues I left at the scene that will indicate that one of us is responsible. Then they will question us separately. Miss Holt will question you and Mr Steele (Sherlock practically spat out his name) will question me.”

They exited the lift not seeing the brown haired woman staring after them, mouth agape in astonishment.

\---------------------------------------

Laura practically threw herself into Steele’s office. He was sat behind his desk, thoughtfully playing with a pen. He looked up.

“What have you done?” Laura yelled at him. Steele raised his eyebrow.

“We have a case, Laura, you just missed Mr and Mrs Morstan. Mrs Morstan was held at gunpoint and had her jewellery stolen.” Steele seemed quite excited.

“Mr and Mrs Morstan! Is Mr Morstan, tall, dark hair, slim, while Mrs Morstan is small, brown hair?” Laura queried icily.

“You saw them?” Steele smiled at her. “Quite the charming couple, I thought.”

“That man is not Mr Morstan!” Laura exclaimed. “His name is Sherlock Holmes. Have you heard of Sherlock Holmes, Mr Steele?”. She placed her hands on the desk leaning towards him with a dark glare.

Steele thought for a moment and then shook his head.

“He’s a consulting detective for New Scotland Yard. He must to on to us, on to you. What did you tell him?” Laura was sounding frantic.

“Calm down Laura.” Steele soothed. He got up out of his chair and gathered her into his arms, gently stroking her back. “I didn’t tell him anything.” 

Laura had calmed down and extracted herself from Steele’s arms, much to his annoyance.

“We find out what we can about them, especially who he’s with and I know just who to contact. Then you and I will pay them a visit.” Laura smiled grimly. “Let’s see if we can find out what they’re up to.”


	2. Chapter 2

Sherlock had taken Molly for lunch, although Molly had queried whether he would rather take ‘Mind Molly’ instead and now they were making their way slowly back to their hotel. They were holding hands at Sherlock’s insistence to keep up appearances. Molly didn’t quite understand this as one minute they were supposed to act all cuddly, the next they were supposed to be at each other’s throats and now back to being cuddly again. She preferred being cuddly with Sherlock, she quite liked holding his hand and was not really looking forward to this being all over and going back to being pathologist Molly. Molly didn’t realise but she was slowly squeezing Sherlock’s hand tighter and tighter as her thoughts turned more stressful.

“Are you ok, Molly?” Sherlock stopped suddenly, just outside what looked to be an expensive jewellers. He pulled her to him and wrapped his arms around her in a loose embrace. Molly took the opportunity to rest her cheek on his chest and to breathe him in, the wonderful smell of Sherlock. 

“Hmm, fine.” She whispered. Sherlock held her tighter, dropping a light kiss on the top of her head.  
“Is someone watching?” Molly asked.

“Oh, umm. I’m just assuming so.” Sherlock spoke hastily. “Let’s go inside this jeweller’s shop. See about getting you a new engagement and wedding ring.”

“What? Why do we need to do that?”

“We’re pretending” whispered Sherlock opening the door and pushing Molly through.

Molly didn’t like any of the rings inside the shop. They were all far too flashy and expensive. Molly would rather have something pretty and unique to her.

“Well?” Sherlock asked, watching her intently.

“Molly Morstan would like that one.” Molly pointed to one which was quite expensive and quite gaudy. Sherlock’s eyebrows raised. He didn’t miss her using her fake name either.

“What about Molly Hooper, what ring would she like?” Again he whispered the words in her ear. Molly’s head snapped round and she glared at him.

“Really, Sherlock? Why would Sherlock Holmes want to ask Molly Hooper about engagement rings?” Molly whispered just as fiercely back. She turned and walked out of the shop, Sherlock swiftly following and catching up with her just outside the hotel, he caught her arm just as she was about to enter.

“I thought I might go to the bar. Why don’t you go back to our suite, I’m sure Miss Holt will join you shortly.”

Molly just nodded her head. Sherlock dipped his head and kissed her gently on the cheek. “Sorry” He whispered. Molly gave him a small smile and then went back to their suite.

\------------------------------------

Laura entered the bar and immediately spotted Sherlock Holmes sat at a table, a glass of whiskey in his hand. She headed towards him.

“Mr Morstan?” Sherlock turned to her and she offered her hand. Sherlock stared at it and then quirked an eyebrow at her. Laura wasn’t fazed, she knew all about Sherlock Holmes. She dropped her hand and smiled wryly at him. “I’m Laura Holt from the Remington Steele Agency. I’ve just got a few questions to ask. May I sit down?” She didn’t wait for an answer and just sat down. She was then treated to a full Sherlock Holmes deduction as he looked her up and down before finally focusing on her face, a look of chagrin on his face. Laura’s smile grew wider.

“Mr Morstan, or maybe I should call you by your first name” Laura paused. “Sherlock?” She looked meaningfully at him. Sherlock glowered at her, before huffing out a soft laugh.

“I always miss something.” Sherlock admitted. He called the waiter over, ordering another scotch for himself and a glass of wine for Laura. “So you’re the detective, not Remington Steele.” 

“Mr Steele is an excellent detective.” Laura said defensively.

“Which is why you’re here and not him. Who is he, Miss Holt? Because I’ve done my research and Remington Steele didn’t exist until recently. Oh I understand why you made the name up but where does he come into it?”

Laura took a sip of her wine. “Maybe I should ask where Molly Hooper comes into it?” Sherlock’s hand shot out and gripped her wrist hard. “Leave Molly out of this. Who is Steele?”

Laura just calmly looked at him and he let go of her wrist. “The rings which were stolen, you stole them didn’t you? Oh you didn’t do the deed yourself but hired someone to do it for you. Molly is quite a good actress isn’t she? She had everyone believing that the hold up was real.”

“It was real, for her. She didn’t know anything about it. Now let’s get back to Steele, shall we? It’s what I came for after all.” Sherlock was getting extremely annoyed, Laura could tell. She sighed.

“I was hoping I wouldn’t have to do this, but you leave me with no other choice.” She put her hand in her pocket and she could see Sherlock go white. “It’s not a gun, Mr Holmes.” She pulled out her mobile and then sent a text message. A few moments later Sherlock’s phone rang.

“Excuse me.” Sherlock picked up his phone and answered. It was Mycroft.

“Sherlock, what are you doing in LA with Molly Hooper and why are you upsetting Miss Holt?” Mycroft’s amused voice came over the phone.

“What’s it to you, Mycroft.” Sherlock growled. “I’m after Steele, he’s some sort of conman. He’s no more a detective than you’re allergic to cake.” Mycroft laughed snootily.

“Leave Steele alone, Sherlock. Jealousy doesn’t become you.”

“And what if I choose not to?” 

“Sherlock when you were away playing in Europe, Steele saved the life of Molly Hooper. Oh, he doesn’t know it was her or that he saved a life but if it wasn’t for the part he played, your pathologist wouldn’t be here today.” Sherlock’s blood ran cold. “Oh and by the way” Mycroft continued. “My sources tell me you visited a jeweller’s shop today. Am I expecting some happy news?”

“No.” Sherlock spat out before ending the call.

He turned back to Laura who was watching him with an amused but understanding smile.

“Are you in a relationship with Steele?” Sherlock asked out of the blue. Laura blinked and then flushed slightly.

“Mr Steele and I don’t mix business with pleasure.” She paused, her flush deepening. “Well, hardly ever.”

“Hmm” Sherlock smiled a small smile. 

“So, shall we find Mr Steele and your Miss Hooper?” She asked, standing up and gesturing to him. Sherlock only nodded and they walked out of the bar.

\------------------------------------

When Molly answered the door she was surprised to see Remington Steele at the door. She let him in and gestured to one of the sofas. Molly sat in an armchair.

“Sh..uh..Scott isn’t here.” Molly inwardly winced hoping he hadn’t noticed her faux pas. Steele smiled understandingly at her.

“It’s ok, Miss Hooper, or may I call you Molly? Lovely name by the way. No we know you and Sherlock aren’t Mr and Mrs Morstan.” Steele spoke soothingly. “Laura recognised Mr Holmes. She’s a big fan of his apparently.”

“There’s no accounting for taste.” Molly replied cryptically. “Would you like a drink?” She gestured to the drinks cabinet and poured them both a whiskey. “So why are you here? Are you going to arrest me or something?”

Steele frowned. “No. What I don’t understand is how you got involved with all this?” Molly shrugged.

“That’s Sherlock for you.” Molly stared at Steele into his blue eyes and wondered why she couldn’t be in love with someone like him.

“You love him, don’t you? I might not be a great detective like Sherlock Holmes but even I can see that.” Steele drank his drink.

“I wish I didn’t. Oh he’s amazing, the way his mind works is fantastic and he absolutely gorgeous but he’s emotionally constipated and has no sense of tact.” Molly took a deep breath. “Sorry but he makes me so mad sometimes.” She stood up and walked back over to the drinks cabinet putting her glass down. 

The door rattled slightly as though someone was trying to open it. Steele jumped up and crossed over to Molly.

“Let’s see if we make him jealous, shall we?” He held Molly in his arms, turning her so that she was facing the door but he had his back to it. He gently placed his lips over her mouth making it look like they were kissing. The door opened and then slammed shut.

“If you wouldn’t mind taking your hands off my Molly.” Sherlock drawled softly. Steele let Molly go and turned to Sherlock.

“Aah, Sherlock. How nice to see you.” He realised that Laura was behind Sherlock, looking bemused. “Molly, this is Laura, my associate. Laura this is Molly.” Molly smiled at Laura and nodded and then glared at Sherlock.

“I’m not your Molly, Sherlock.” She snapped at him. “I can kiss who I like.” 

Sherlock had a face like thunder and stepped towards her. Laura hastily stepped up to Steele and grabbed his arm. “We should go. It was nice meeting you, Sherlock. Molly.” Sherlock nodded at her and glowered at Steele who smiled charmingly back at him before leaving with Laura.

“Phew! I thought he was going to hit you.” Laura commented as they made their way back to the lift. “And why were you kissing Molly?” She mock frowned at him.

“I was trying to make him jealous. It was a spur of the moment thing. I think it worked, don’t you?” He pulled Laura to him and she laughed before pulling his head down for a kiss.

\--------------------------------------

“Molly, we need to talk.” Sherlock took her hand and sat her down on the sofa, before sitting down himself next to her.

“Is Mind Molly prettier than me?” Molly asked out of nowhere. Sherlock huffed in exasperation.

“No, Molly. She is YOU, Molly. I don’t understand why you keep going on about it.” Molly fidgeted and pulled her hand from his.

“You have conversations with her that you don’t have with me. Do you do anything else with her?” Molly was on the verge of tears.

“For God’s sake Molly! She is you! She is smart and brilliant and beautiful because you are smart and brilliant and beautiful. She started out in a white coat, she…. you were always in the lab or the morgue at the beginning. Then you were in your flat but just recently…. My favourite thought of you, picture of you, my Mind Molly you, you’re in my flat, curled up on my sofa reading a book with your glasses slipping down your nose, looking so adorable and I just want to take you in my arms and kiss you and just hold you.” Sherlock grabbed her hands and looked straight at her. “Will you let me? Because I think I’m in love with you, Molly Hooper and it’s driving me crazy. Please let me.” He begged.

“Ok.” Molly breathed shakily. Sherlock pulled her towards him and he kissed her gently, hesitantly and then more forcefully. It was a long while before they pulled away from each other.

“Will you be mine, Molly?” Sherlock asked breathlessly. Molly blushed.

“I already am.” She replied. They kissed some more. “But I’m not wearing that godawful fake engagement ring.”

“That’s already back at the shop.” Sherlock replied smirking. “I knew you’d hate it. No, the ring I’ve bought for you is a lot nicer, I’ve had it made especially.” He got up and found his coat, taking out a dark red velvet box. “This is the one I got for you.” He opened it and inside was a ruby and diamond ring, small, dainty and very Mollyish. 

“Oh my God, that is perfect.” Molly admitted. Sherlock lifted it out and then put it on her finger.

“Will you marry me, Molly?” He asked shyly.

“Oh please, yes.” Molly whispered. “I love you so much, Sherlock.”

“I love you too the future Mrs Holmes.” Molly laughed and then kissed him.


End file.
